Intersting.

So, on top of a few musical opportunities (Possibly playing bass for some guys in Blue Springs, Working on some stuff with just me and a computer, and me, Jeffrey, and Austin playing a comedic country song), it seems that I'll be designing a t-shirt for some improve troupe in Tupelo.

I was called by one of the members of the group, who is the sister of the guy who wants me to play bass for him, and I guess I'll be getting some email soon from them with the info on who they are and such, so that I can start working on some sketches.

This summer may turn out to be a good bit of fun.

Well.

I don't have any whining to do this time, but I feel like I should put a new blog up anyway.

Lately I've been in a very creative mood. I've written the lyrics to two songs ("Here is Hell" and "I Got My Baby on Layaway") and I've come up with snippets of lyrics for three other ones.

I'm supposedly going to get to play bass for some guys that are trying to get a band together over in Blue Springs, so we'll see how that goes, but mainly I'm still looking forward to getting my laptop fixed (STILL NOT FIXED) so that I can record shit myself. I know that there's no way in hell that anyone else would ever let me sing for them, but I like singing, no matter how bad I sound, so doing my own little project seems to be the perfect cure for that.

As far as other things go, I'm very much looking forward to getting out of school, and also looking forward to my birthday, if I don't forget about it like I did last year. I don't really have any plans on what I'll be doing for my birthday, but if anybody has any suggestions, I'm open to them. I'd like to do something different. Maybe spend a day in Memphis or somewhere, doing whatever the fuck a person not old enough to drink CAN do. (not much)

I'm still all mopey about my mental issues concerning women, but I'm trying to work on that. Trying is the key word there.

Ummm, I can't really think of anything else, so I think I'm going to leave it here.

OH OH OH. Forgot. I demand that everybody go out and watch Mirrormask if you haven't seen it yet. It's very good, and I'm mad at myself for not having bought it earlier.

Which leads me to something else that I forgot to say. I have some new favorite artists to add to my list of favorite artists (redundant?). Ralph Steadman and Dave McKean. Look 'em up.

OKAY I GO NOW BYE BYE

Soundtrack of My Life

Even though I was tagged on Facebook, I'm gonna do this on my blog, which is shown on my Facebook anyway. I feel I should add that I'm using my newly purchased iPod for this, and all I have on it so far is mostly The Beatles: Past Masters, Vol. 1 and 2 and all the music you can download from quoteunquoterecords.com. So this won't be too interesting.

If your life was a movie, what would the soundtrack be?
so here's how it works
1. Open your library
2. Put it on shuffle
3. Press play
4. For every question, type the song and artist that's playing
5. When you go to a new question, press the next button

opening credits:
Her and Cigarettes - Cheap Girls

waking up:
Slow Down - The Beatles

first day of school:
Sarah Lynne or What Do You Call a One Man Band Without a Girlfriend? - The Matt Kurz One

falling in love:
Teachers Get Tired - Shinobu

fight song:
People Pops & Fudgesicles For The Hit Factory - The Arrogant Sons of Bitches

breaking up:
Source and the Sound - Laura Stevenson and the Cans

prom:
Even Winning Feels Bad - Bomb the Music Industry!

life:
Stay High (Magic) - Cheap Girls

mental breakdown:
Attitude Adjustment - Let Me Crazy

driving:
Pixilated Flowers - Pegasuses-XL

flashback:
Holy Wars - Ghotto Ghetto

getting back together:
Jam is a Four Letter Word - The Riot Before

wedding:
Sensible Heart - City and Colour

birth of child:
The Times They Are A-Changin' - Bob Dylan

final battle:
Saddr Weirdr - Bomb the Music Industry!

death scene:
Kill Your Mood - Cheap Girls

funeral song:
We Can Work It Out - The Beatles

end credits:
Lady Madonna - The Beatles

Some of the Best Ska Albums Ever (In No Certain Order)

-Three Cheers for Disappointment by The Arrogants Sons of Bitches

-Street Gospels by Bedouin Soundclash

-Hello Rockview by Less Than Jake

-How it Goes by Big D and the Kids Table

-Keasbey Nights by Streetlight Manifesto

-Sublime by Sublime

-Hang-ups by Goldfinger

-War Profiteering is Killing Us All by The Suicide Machines

8 is a weird number to use, so I'll try to think of at least two more to round it out sometime. This is what you get for now. GET TO LISTENING.

Love & Romance

I think my outlook on love and romance is going to keep me from ever finding love and romance.

I have very strong ideals about these types of things, and would be considered a hopeless romantic by some people (including myself). The fact that I put everything on such a high pedestal makes it much harder for me to ever reveal my feelings to anyone I like. It's like when you're a little kid, and you know there are some cookies on top of the refrigerator, but the only way to get to those cookies you want so much is to do a dangerous balancing act on the back of a chair. I suppose most people are willing to risk the pain just to get those cookies. Unfortunately, I don't want to be hurt, so I do without, thinking that to be the best route to choose.

Any girl I even somewhat like becomes automatically untouchable. I'll talk to them, and I'll do what I can to use my charm and wit, but that only ends in us being friends, because I'm never willing to stand on that fucking chair. So I get to look at them from afar, just thinking about them, and all the things I could do to show them how much I care. All this thinking ends up making them even more of an unattainable goal.

People say that all I need to do is just show a little confidence, but I don't know how, since I don't have anything to be confident about. I would have to have some sort of victory of some sort in my past in order to be confident. So there's no way to be confident at first. It's like some horrible endless cycle. I can't be confident because I've never successfully asked a girl out, and I can't ask a girl out because I have no confidence.

I'm thinking that I should accept that nobody will ever think of me as more than a friend (fat uggo, blah blah blah), and just stop thinking about those things. It's possible to go on living without a girl to care for, a girl who cares for me. I may never feel complete, but maybe I'm not meant to be completely happy. I mean, my whole plan of recording songs when I get my laptop back would probably benefit from all this heartfelt material. Probably not, though.

Is it bad that I never think of anything sexual, and usually daydream about being able to hold someone in my arms, maybe sit with them on the couch watching tv, snuggled up, her head on my shoulder, my head leaning on her head? Having a feeling of perfect contentment in the world? I'm guessing it's probably bad. Most guys don't talk about that stuff. All I ever hear come out of people's mouths when it comes to relationships is sex. I don't even care that much about sex. BIG SURPRISE.

God, the self-pity levels on this blog must be off the charts. I'm sorry if you (whoever you are) took time out of your busy busy schedule to read this. I don't have a time machine, so you'll be forced to live with your mistakes. You can at least take joy in the fact that you're doing better than I am. (This could be a lie, in which case, I'm very sorry.)

Okay, well, even though I have a whole lot more that I could say to continue feeling bad for myself, I'm gonna cut myself off here. Have a nice day.